Painful sight, painful night

Painful sight, painful night

The aftermath of a storm, is nothing but trauma

Phew. My hands are really tired from shredding carrots. I am preparing the ingredients for tomorrow's cooking. My Bahasa indonesia project is due tomorrow and my group needs to cook for 200 plus people haha. It's going to be quite a grand project tomorrow. Everybody will be performing in cultural indonesia activities, it's like having a party haha. I will have to skip Dr Adrian's lecture tomorrow cuz my project presentation clashes with his lecture. Will upload photos soon once i get them from Benjamin or from someone else haha.

Finally, all my mid-term tests over. I will be able to take a break for around 2 weeks. Going to recharge myself fully before another blow of stress hits on me again. Doing my lab report for now, need to hand up the draft term paper to let YC vet through on Sunday. Tsk tsk, cant i just get a proper rest without any interference from school work. Prof Lai announced the answers for the big test tat i did on Monday. As expected, it was a killer. I lost marks at almost every question. What's worse is that i lost all 35 marks completely for question 3. Sigh, i dont have the energy to procrastinate. I am just disappointed with my performance. Dr Xue Feng's test today was quite ok though. I manage to score the IR questions but i got stump at the NMR questions. NMR is one of my weaker area and there were just so many questions. 45 mins just wasnt enough to answer everything. I manage to do all but i dont have time to check. Most of my friends however did not get a chance to complete the paper. Overall the mid-term tests killed a lot of people. Lots of casualties, lots of tears, blood and sweat shedded. We did our best, i am just so tired. Tired of procrastination, time to work even harder than ever.

I was fascinated by blackholes today at Dr Cindy's lecture. Blackholes, one of the greatest astronomical mystery in our universe. You know it is really interesting. Time stops when you are entering the blackhole, it literally freezes. Yup sounds like a sci-fi fantasy experience right. They say that if you were to enter a blackhole, you wont notice it until you try to get out from it. However nobody in this world will get to survive a trip through the blackhole. As tempting as it might sound, being frozen in time and leading an immortal life, you will be shredded into bits by the gravitational pull of the blackhole before you can even experience time freeze haha. For once i believe in the theory of forever-ism. Yet, you cant be around forever. Time doesnt permit that. I am just a nobody, who am i to defy the laws of physics haha.

I know you can hear it today. I was quite embarressed but at the same time delighted that you caught hold of the news. I feel very happy. Still, it doesnt make much of a difference whether you know it or not. Because i am still a nobody in your life.

When things arent meant to be what it seems to be, dont try to force it. I learn it through the hard way, not once but so many times that i almost lost track. You can think about it all the time but you mustnt cross the boundary. How i wish that i can cross the line, to know you better at a higher level. I saw you at the bus-stop today and somehow i thought tat i saw you taking a glance at me from afar. I couldnt be sure because i dont dare to look at you in the eyes. All i can do is to just see you walk by along the sideline of my life. Somehow i wish time could freeze at tat moment. Being at the sideline, that's the closest i can get to you for now. I couldnt pop the question, neither could you. Or would you?

I shouted my frustrations and sorrows to the wind.

The wind just carries it away,

without a word and without a trace.

Things always look nice from afar

when the pictures are small,

when we just met.

Things are starting to become clearer when you are near

flaws can be seen

what's perfect cant be change.

Things are starting to become blur when you are too near

bigger pictures of you are scary,

i feel that i just befriended a monster

I was blind by your words

Deaf to your thoughts

But i am certainly not stupid, to what's real and what's not.