Daydreamer

Daydreamer

Today is Day 37.

Boy, you're still delusional as of today.

Exams are coming. Time to get my mind off at home and start studying outside. Even so, my mind tends to wander off somewhere. Damn.

I'm very aware of what Dr Syoung taught to us during the new media lecture. I'm afraid that i'm able to grasp myself at the moment to stop what I am doing. I'm not weak, i'm just growing slowly.

There are things that i really want to share with some people at the moment. They could really give me the best advice to what i am facing now. Yet, i'm very worried about their reaction and aftermath. Haha, i feel like if i am wasting time here.

I mustnt be so stupid to believe in whatever people said. Trust yourself more than others. Love yourself more than others. That's why the gate exist. Yet, gates are more than just there to keep things out. They are meant to be pushed and broken down to explore what lies beneath. At the moment, it stays rigid.

I know i know. I am completely aware of my surroundings and my doings. My mind is saint clear, but there are times when i want to indulge myself in doing stupid stuff and purposely blind myself to everything. Cant a person enjoys acting dumb once in a while?

The personality test was right, it's hard for me to be loved by someone. For that person once exist is now gone. It's not easy to replace it.

I dream a dream, that everything here is a dream where dreams dont come true, and what's true are nightmares.