Words to the fallen ear

A saturday again haha. Spend my time playing Tales all the way at one shot haha training etc, almost near to confronting Arietta soon *i dont want to kill her...* A rather placid day for me, spend a long time chatting to a friend on msn from 2 plus till 7. That was one long chat but i really hope that he can hear me through my words.

My presence may not be of importance, but that doenst mean that your presence means nothing to me. When something that you deem so important to protect is on the verge of self-destruction, will you do whatever you have in your means to prevent it from happening? I tried to do my best to protect whatever i had, i really did my best to offer all kinds of option. I was offensive along the way but i got to shake your mind to reality. Afterall that is the only way i can do, i may not mean what i say sometimes but this time i am really sincere. It's not the end of the world for me but somehow it does feel like it this way. Sometimes i just deem myself as a nuisance: who am i to judge, who am i to control, who am i to interfere. On one word i may not care, but honestly deep down inside i really really care so much that i cant express out in words. I know that you are in trouble but there isnt anything much i can do. I know that you are going to hell and you may enjoy it, but i dont. I dont i dont i dont!!! I really dont want you to go to hell you know it yourself, i can say that i have no rights, i may just give up and let you do things your way, but somehow if i were to have the power i really want to keep you away from that hell place. Temptations are inevitable. If it's not for the current situation you wont stray into this road, i want to help but you wont want me to. You offered help but your help isnt gonna solve the problem. Who am i to complain again, i am just a someone in this big big world of yours. I dont want to be a nobody, i want to be a somebody in your life that can make a difference. And this time i really dont want you to go no matter what i say to let you go by your ways, or how i wont care for you. I dont want you to go to hell but why dont you ever listen to me EVER! I am really in pain that my words are of deafen, i am really depress today. I am glad that you share this information with me even though i wasnt of much help at all, i know that i am not a nobody to you but still i am not a somebody. Being so helpless, do you know how i am feeling now even though i cant feel how you are feeling..... You are a fool but i am an even bigger fool myself, i want to breakdown somebody please save me.... argh!

Council Meeting: Paradise in Hell or Heaven

Shinn: Emergency meeting guys. I need your verdict
Shinn: Heaven or Hell, i choose Heaven
Funny: Since Shinn-sama choose Heaven, i want Heaven too
Lust: It's for his own happiness, i choose Hell
Sorrow: I want to come out more, i choose Hell
Dark: Blah blah, if you two are hoggers at it, i rather choose Heaven this time
Shinn: Thanks. Councils?
Frion: For rage or jealousy. I am in support of Heaven
Wendine: I dont want to see unnecessary worries. I choose Heaven
Karzen: It's his path so just let it be. Hell for him
Dzark: Follow the nature of your true path. In favour of Heaven
Shinn: How about you three?
B.M: I am in favour of Heaven
V.R: Same for Heaven
Jim: I just want you to be happy, i choose Heaven
Shinn: Verdict is set. 9 is to 3. Heaven over Hell
Shinn: I have live for regrets in the past, i dont want to have that again. Even if it fails i wont give up on you. Cuz you are not just a friend to me, you are my foolish friend.

I dont want to be helpless, not again....